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All Choked Up

(I originally wrote this for May 22. Wrote it as a page, not a post. Yeah. That kind of day)

So, under “Monique DeSoto,” I released “Patti Goes to the Dungeon”recently. 99 cent short story, sold a whopping ten copies, but still…

(99 cents. Go buy the damned story. $.99 won’t bankrupt you and you’ll laugh your butt off. Here, let me help…)

https://www.amazon.com/Patti-Goes-Dungeon-Monique-DeSoto-ebook/dp/B06Y1C5W69/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1495494575&sr=8-1&keywords=patti+goes+to+the+dungeon

I’m getting asked for the next one.

Yikes!

This is the moment when a lot of authors talk about how they get inspired and motivated and go a week without sleep pounding the keyboard to meet the demand of their fans.

Image result for kermit pounding the keyboard

https://youtu.be/wmq6VVNqPz4

My reaction?

(eek)

I’m like some Douglas Adams character that only functions when you don’t look at it directly. Very strange mental block, I must admit. But then again, I’ve never done things the way most folks do. I got in trouble in kindergarten. A lot, actually, but in this case, we were told to draw a brown bear with a black outline. I drew a blue bear with a brown outline (my fashion sense wasn’t fully developed. I didn’t know you don’t put blue with brown). I did my own thing.

My point is that I had a bunch of ideas for more funny erotica. After all, I want to turn this into a collection. Had I written them before the reviews came in, I’d be golden. Maybe some editing, but they’d have flown.

Now that people are looking, I’ve gone dry.

“(Yes, Folks! She thinks she can make a living at this!” “Yeah, right!”)

So, ahead of For Love of Books and Florida, July 15 in Sarasota, I will produce the next Monique DeSoto short story. I will start scribbling it tonight (I MUST start with pen and paper. It’s a jump start to the creative process).

And not choke.

Reasons Why

It was suggested to me that I should make a list of all the reasons why I write stories, make bracelets, and some other things I’d like to get going (graphic t shirts). I’m going to do that here (and has anyone heard of a magazine called Pyramid? or The Pyramid?)

 

  1. Books: I like to create stories.
  2. Books: I get inspired by all kinds of things that can play out into multiple acts with beginning, middle, end.
  3. Books: I’d like to make enough money from writing to support myself.
  4. Books: It’s cook to get to the point where the characters stop “listening” to you and have been fueled enough with detail to start acting and talking on their own.
  5. Books: I like to explore ideas.
  6. Books: I wrote These Foolish Things because I thought older lovers are interesting.
  7. Books: I’m writing short stories because I’m used to writing essays, briefs, and papers.
  8. Books: I’m writing erotica because it’s legal (for now) and I can give it my own twist.
  9. Books: I want to create characters that people care about, want to have as their friends.
  10. Books: This is a lasting legacy.
  11. Books: I’m good at this.
  12. Books/writing: I like to entertain people. My words get a better response than me as myself.
  13. Books/writing: I want to write things that inspire people to think differently about a subject, to see themselves in, to learn something
  14. Books/writing: I have something to say
  15. Books/writing: my great-grandmother, Daisy Washburn Lovell, wrote two books, “Glad Tidings” and “Glimpses of Early Wareham.”
  16. Books/writing: If Grandma Lovell is going to be in the Library of Congress, so am I
  17. Books/writing: I think if I get these stories out of my head and onto paper, I may be able to sleep better.
  18. Books/writing: I get a kick out of autographing copies.
  19. Books/writing: Reviews: so far, they’re positive
  20. Books/writing: I have an excuse to attend group signing events
  21. Books/bracelets/T shirts: the American standard for judging the quality of your talent is whether someone is willing to pay for it.
  22. Bracelets: I have friends with issues that certain stones can treat.
  23. Bracelets: I love handling the stones.
  24. Bracelets: Researching which stones do what is fun.
  25. Bracelets: The bracelets are beautiful
  26. Bracelets: I enjoy earning money from something that I create.
  27. T shirts: It’s fashion, in a fashion
  28. T shirts: It’s fun to come up with messages
  29. T shirts: colors, glittery print = FUN
  30. All of it: I am more than my day job and goddammit, I aim to prove that.

So What Else is New?

Yeah, I owe you two posts. NOT THAT ANYBODY COMPLAINED!!!!

Post #1: Things Promotional

I did an interview with the Hangin’ With Web Show and it will be up on Youtube tomorrow!

Hangin’ With Youtube Channel

And Wednesday, April 25, 2017 (aka TOMORROW) I will be LIVE on Facebook, you can come hassle me at BookRhythm’s Night of Romance live event:

Night of Romance – Facebook

Plus, Affaire de Coeur magazine has been tweeting me up all over the place and… Monique DeSoto.  Monique. Yeah. We’ll talk about her later.

Post #2: So What the Hell Have I Been Doing?

 

I have been doing some non-book stuff. I make bracelets for healing. They look like this:

anti anxiety lepidolite anti anxiety sodalite

Both are anti-anxiety. The left is made with lepidolite, which is more of a mood stabilizer. The right is sodalite to fend off anxiety attacks.

prosperity prosperity 2

These guys are for prosperity. Both are made with green aventurine, which attracts prosperity.

anti migraine 1

Anti-migraine: Amethyst, Lapis lazuli

And

dragon bracelet strung

Courage: dragons blood jasper and dragon head bead. This stone is new to me. I love it.

All for sale. Inquire within.

Besides that, I rewrote a friend’s resume and edited a couple of stories.

And baked a ham.

Yes, I’ve been busy.

Did You Miss Me?

I know, I know; I didn’t publish anything last Thursday, the 30th (what would have been my mother’s 81st birthday. Yes, I am estranged from my immediate family, but I keep track of the dates). What can I say? I flaked. And I didn’t hear any complaints from out there, so…

Book Obsessed Babes in Jacksonville, FL is ON this Saturday, April 8. Tickets still available (the freebies I had have gone). Here’s the link:

image

Tickets for Book Obsessed Babes 2017

Come on out. Sheer Bliss Events and the Omni put on a great event last year. Serioyusly, worth the price of admission. And there are usually great raffle baskets.

I have been working on other projects, writing projects that I can’t really talk about here. Yeah, I’m delving into writing erotica, I’m using a pen name for it, and I need to properly launch it. So…maybe later.

You would think the toughest part of creating a book is writing it. Wrong-O. Marketing is a cast-iron bitch from the darkest depths of Hell who wants you to die of embarrassment just because. And it’s not easy on a shoestring. With a day job. My day job.

I can attest to the difficulty mostly because of how blessedly ignorant I am. I figured “Write book. Get cover. Upload to Amazon. People find book. Sales go through the roof. Done.”

Not so much. You need a campaign. You need to launch it like the European Space Agency launched the Rosetta spacecraft to land the Philae probe on a comet 10 years (10 YEARS!) and 6.4 billion kilometers after it was launched. They started planning it in 1986. Rosetta was launched in 2004. Philae landed (wrong) in 2014. That’s 28 years.

This comet was probed by aliens.

This comet was probed by aliens.

I’m not that patient.

Confession: (and yes, another reference) I think highly of my writing skills. In “Amadeus,” Salieri looks over an assortment of Mozart’s sheet music and sees that there are no corrections to it. “As if he was taking dictation from God.”

I don't actually work like this but...

I don’t actually work like this but…

Truthfully, I’m probably closer to Salieri.

I figure (wrongly, perhaps, but I have trouble admitting it) that I got it write the first time and additional drafts are for chickenshits. When I am done, I am DONE and don’t wish to get stuck in the after phases of writing. I could rationalize this by copping out, “I’m an artist,” but the truth is, I’d rather have someone else do that part. Publishers aren’t lining up, so guess who has to tote the load? Yup. Annoyed sigh.

So, here I am, having to go back over steps because my impatience caused an error, waiting on a reply to get a book launch party on Facebook, needing to get ISBN, ASIN, the alphabet soup of needed things to sell a book in the Information Age. It’s annoying as hell. But, I’m doing it.

I will try not to flake on the Thursday post. Next Monday, I’ll give you the wrap up from BOBASE