Let Me Entertain You

This blog, this here blog, which got its most hits for a post titled “I Am an Idiot, I Admit It Freely” is supposed to be a marketing tool. “Content, content, Content!” (With the accent on the first syllable to indicate that there is something in the post v. accent on the second syllable to indicate¬†being happy and serene. Given what I see you guys spell and post, – INCLUDING PROFESSIONAL JOURNALISTS. JEEBUS! WHERE ARE YOUR EDITORS??? – I may have to start posting the basics of composition, spelling, and grammar. You just give up one hour of reality TV per week and I’ll have you whipped into shape. I will). Not always easy to come up with something. I have products to promote. Do you bastards ever buy my books? No. 99 freakin’ cents! For good stuff! Seriously! I’m throwing links in here.

I have two books currently available on Amazon under my own name: ” These Foolish Things” and At Last.” As Kindle e-books, they are $1.99 and $.99 respectively.

 

https://www.amazon.com/Susan-Thatcher/e/B00DPX0S7E/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1

And, coming May 13, a short, sassy, sexy NC17 story under a new pen name, Monique Desoto:

https://www.amazon.com/Patti-Goes-Dungeon-Monique-DeSoto-ebook/dp/B06Y1C5W69/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1493595526&sr=1-1&keywords=patti+goes+to+the+dungeon

I am reluctant to plaster my social media accounts with promotions and ads. I can tune out ads I find annoying and tune them out quickly. I don’t want to be one of those promotions. It’s a fine line between getting noticed and getting ignored because you overdid it. A friend who is in advertising tells me it takes five times for someone to see something (an ad) before it registers and the percentage of conversion narrows down in a swift, steep funnel. Not encouraging. I know authors who will hit all of the Facebook author/reader groups they belong to and hit them all daily for a period of time. I don’t know if it works or not; I haven’t felt compelled to buy a lot of books from that method. Kind of like reusing a tea bag. The Law of Diminishing ReturnsI confess: I am not diligent about tweeting (except to respond to the current President’s Twitter feed) or Instagram or Tumblr, Google +, etc. I don’t have a reader group or ¬†a street team. Yet.

I get good advice. Do I follow up on it? Eh, not so much. See previous post about being an idiot.

I have great dreams for these books, that they’ll find their audience, word of mouth will take over and I’ll have sleeper hits beloved by millions. I don’t know if that’s appropriate self-confidence, self-delusion, or the inner six-year-old playing in the backyard and saying, “I’m the greatest batter/dancer/actor/singer ever!”

Greatest? No. I couldn’t dream up a tenth of the scenarios Margaret Atwood can or O.Henry did (Monique DeSoto writes short stories). I do have an imagination. I like to think I write terrific dialogue and while I don’t think I have an entire Universe in my like J.K. Rowling, I do down roads less traveled, like first real love at forty or humorous erotica.

Look: Click the links, buy the books. Get your friends to click the links and buy the books. All 3 are less than one of those Unicorn Frappucinos they had at Starbucks.

Let me entertain you.

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